Why Love & Lordship? A Story

A young, recently married gentleman walked into my office and sat down with a thud.  I had been sharing a series on marriage in our “Sunday School” class and he asked if we could meet to talk further.

He arrived on time and after the usual pleasantries I asked him what was going on.  He proceeded to tell me all that had happened since he got married and how his wife was just nagging him to death.  He was no longer able to do any of the things he’d done as a single man.  No more hours at the bars with the guys.  No more tennis with his friends.  No more spending all his time at the office.  No more this. No more that…he couldn’t even keep track of all the “no mores!”  He was incredulous at what his marriage and life had become.

He “wanted” it to work but she was not “the same person” that he’d dated, fallen in love with and married.  What could he do to make this work?  Better yet, how could he get his wife to see that if he could just be the same guy as he was when he was single everything would be fine? 

I heard his wife’s side of the story from time to time in our class.  Divorce was inevitable and soon became a reality.  Neither was willing to give up themselves for the sake of their spouse nor their marriage.  Marriage and life for both of them was all about self…and that never works.

I’d like to say that their situation was not the norm but unfortunately over the last 30+ years of teaching, mentoring and talking with men and couples, it is far too common.  It hasn’t always ended in divorce but I can say that unless at least one of them, preferably both, learned to die to self, even when they stayed in the marriage it was tolerable at best and miserable at worst. 

Does this sound familiar to you?  It doesn’t have to be.  There’s Hope! 

Here’s what I’ve found over the past 3 decades…the problems aren’t in the conflicts or their resolution, lack of communication, finances, in-laws, your past, even your sex life!  These are all just symptoms.  We can work through all the issues if we’re willing to address and deal with the problem…and that lies much deeper. 

Love and Lordship matters and makes all the difference.  It’s not just the name of this message and ministry, it’s what we are called to in Christ and until we begin in our homes and churches to make His Word the Authority in our life, relationships, marriage and family, we’re not going to find it anywhere else.  This is the only way to negate the relativistic “love” of the culture and a find a Lordship, His Lordship, that is seldom talked about and/or largely ignored!

Christ is not only the Savior of the World; He is the King of Kings and Lord of Lords! He is the Authority because He is the Author! Isn’t it incredible that The Creator and Author of all that exists would offer Himself as THE sacrifice so we could be in relationship with Him? However, there is no relationship in Scripture that allows for Him to be Savior and not Lord.

Let me put it this way … If He’s Lord of all that exists and He’s saved you for a relationship with Him, then who’s Lord in your relationship? If He’s not, then He needs to be. He is patient, loving and certainly gracious and merciful, giving us time to learn and grow in this incredible relationship with Him. However, He knows our heart and whether we are deceiving ourselves or truly desire Him as Lord of every part of our lives.

“Every relationship built on the Love and Lordship of Jesus Christ!” Join us on this journey!