Mentoring Minutes

Loving Others

Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ.  (Ephesians 5:21)

Love and Lordship in Focus…The capacity to love and submit to our neighbor(s)…all others must begin with our willingness to love and submit to Christ as Lord. Lovingly submitting to Christ and to all others is the foundation for every good and Godly relationship.

The Truth in Love…Loving Our Neighbors

As we continue with our focus on The Love of God rooted in His Truth (go to https://loveandlordship.com/blog/discipleship-loving-response-required-to-his-lordship/ to see the 7 great texts on Love in the NT), we look at God’s Covenant Order for manifesting and expressing that love in relationship with others. 

The 6th great text is found in Ephesians 5:21-33…Godly Love expressed in relationships and in particular in the Marriage Covenant and what it represents – Christ and His Bride, The Church.

As in the beginning (Genesis 1 & 2) God’s design begins with the individual (Adam) and then continues in relationship (Eve and marriage), so that faithful continuance of relationships occurs in the New Covenant in Christ.

We see Paul under the inspiration of The Spirit clearly outline in Ephesians 5:21-33 the Covenant Order of relationships (this in no way means that everyone must marry but it does point to how these relationships are to speak to and guide us in loving relationships that strengthen His Church and show His Love to the world)…Note this chapter begins in vv. 1-2, “Be imitators of Christ…”

  1. Submit to one another as unto Christ as Lord (v. 21)
  2. Wives submit to and respect your husbands as you have already learned to do with Christ as Lord (vv. 22, 33)
  3. Husbands servant-lead by example of sacrificial love and submission (show your wife how authority lovingly submits and serves) just as Christ did for His Bride (vv. 23-29)
  4. Personal submission to one another and particularly in marriage is the Love that Christ showed to His Bride and that is what Marriage is supposed to point to and strengthen in loving relationships in His Church (vv. 32-33).
  5. Mutual, submissive Love and Respect are foundations to all Christ-like relationships in the Home and in His Church (v. 33)

Remember that we are broken and Christ makes us whole in His sacrificial Love and His Holy Spirit in and through us!  More specifically on Marriage as the highest of human relationships in future posts, as I want to wrap up our final great texts on Love. This may blow your mind but it’s much needed for us to understand God’s full-orbed love in all our relationships.

Get ready…The first of these 2 texts are easy for us to accept but the second one is tough for us to accept as God’s Love…but His Word and Spirit is our Guide and we need to fully accept His Truth so we can more fully know His Love…and share it with all our neighbors.

The seventh great texts on Love are found in 2 separate texts in Mark 1:40-42; 10:17-22…I call it the full-orbed Love of God.

In these 2 Scriptures we see the “extremes” of God’s Love (if you will allow me that leeway to describe it) in Christ’s interaction with two men. Before I go further answer this question (not a trick question) – Does God/Jesus love perfectly every time? Again, not a trick question and I hope you can honestly answer, “Yes!” This sets the stage for learning, understanding and being willing to mature in and apply His love in our life and our relationships with others.

In Mark 1 we see a leper pursuing Jesus, begging to be healed by Him. Jesus responds with “splanchnizomai” (Greek word meaning “moved (stirred emotionally) with compassion”) and He heals the leper. Anyone got a problem with this kind of love? I certainly don’t and while I’ve never had leprosy, I’m so thankful for God’s compassionate and gracious love in my life over and over again! How about you?

God’s Love, as modeled by Christ, certainly involves our emotions and definitely our compassion but we, in our flesh, must be careful not to be led by our emotions which can easily carry us away in passionate pursuits apart from Christ or prideful service in helping others. We must learn to love as described in God’s Word in these 7 great texts (and others) so our service is not rooted in our flesh and therefore in vain but is rooted in His Love.

How do you love those closest to you with the compassionate Love of Christ? Your spouse? Your children and family? His Family? Others?

We’ve looked at Christ’s perfect love expressed in compassionate healing of the leper. As we continue to explore and grow in God’s Love we encounter another young man pursuing Jesus in Mark 10:17 and he asks, “What must I do to be saved (or inherit eternal life in some translations)?” Jesus perfect, loving response (remember my earlier question about God/Jesus loving perfectly?) is described here as “agapao” from the root word, “agape” which is how the writers of The Bible in the leading of The Holy Spirit describe Godly Love or the selfless, sacrificial, unconditional Love of God.

Pay close attention to v. 21 in Mark 10 to find the deeply loving impetus for Jesus response which can be very difficult for us to understand. Jesus’ answer flowing from Godly Love was “go sell all you have and give it to the poor and then you can come follow me” (my translation). The rich young ruler, in receiving Christ’s sacrificial Love, chose to walk away.

Jesus didn’t chase after Him, bargain with him, ask for only 10% so he could join their merry band and that is troubling in today’s churches if we’re honest with ourselves. How do I know this? Because we do all the latter things mentioned just to keep people coming rather than the most sacrificial loving thing of graciously telling them the Truth and trusting The Spirit to work in that Truth-seed of His Word to bring about changed lives for Eternity.

This is tough for us, growing up in our modern and postmodern culture, but it is directly in line with God’s Truth and Christ’s modeling of it! His Love was perfect for both the leper and the rich young ruler, but for the sake of teaching us, the wording of The Holy Spirit shows us that His “agapao” love for the rich young ruler was stronger (more sacrificial, selfless) than the emotional, compassionate love for the leper because He knew what was needed and He loved accordingly…and perfectly!

The full-orbed Love of God on one hand is the “heart-felt compassion that heals and restores” and on the other hand the “heart-spoken Truth that convicts”…the latter is seemingly more sacrificial as The Word indicates.

We could learn much from this in our lives, homes, families and churches.  I think it is also what compelled Paul to write in Ephesians 4:14-16 (emphasis v. 15) where speaking the Truth in Love is what matures us in all aspects as His Body into Christ as the Head.  We mature by Truth in Love!

Let’s all be willing to know and grow in the full-orbed love of God in Christ so we can show all our neighbors (fellow human beings) what that love is like.

Food for Thought…I pray that you know God’s perfect full-orbed Love in whatever way that He knows You need it today! Be willing to receive His Truth in Love no matter what it may cost you. It is always good even when it’s not easy.  Be willing to share the same love with others as He shows you their need.

Love in Action

  1. Read the Scriptures in this article and ask The Holy Spirit to teach you how to love according to His commands and priorities.
  2. Honor your marriage and spouse by loving them above all but Christ.
  3. Daily look for ways to love others, beginning with your spouse, children and family (as applicable) with compassion action. 
  4. Ask The Spirit to show you how to speak the Truth in Love as needed and as a reflection of God’s sacrificial Agape (Love) and ask for the courage to do so.

Love and Lordship Prayer Focus Heavenly Father, help me to love like You do.  Let me love in humility with a servant’s heart, practicing Your kind of authority in love as Christ’s disciple. In His Name. Amen.

The Truth of Love

Before the Passover celebration, Jesus knew that his hour had come to leave this world and return to his Father. He had loved his disciples during his ministry on earth, and now he showed them the full extent of his love.  (John 13:1, NLT)

Love and Lordship in Focus…His Love for us in saving and redeeming us should compel us to respond according to His Word that states that if we love Him we will keep (obey) His commands.  His Love for us as Savior requires the response of our love for Him as Lord.

The Truth in Love

1 John 4:19; Mark 12:29-31; Matthew 22:37-39

These should guide us according to God’s Word as to how we are to love and disciple others to love as well…(linked texts)

1) 1 John 4:7-21…God is Love and Love is from God…we can only love because He first loved us (v. 19); (John 3:16; 1 John 3:16)

2) Mark 12:29-31…A clear priority and order for love of Him and others

Build on these in future weeks as we move into loving and serving others building on Mark 12:31…loving others as self…

3) John 13:1-17…Love lived out in humility, service, authority and discipleship

4) Romans 8:37-39…God’s unfailing and inseparable love for us

5) 1 Corinthians 13…Literally, known as the Love Chapter describes what Godly love looks like to us and through us (emphasis vv. 4-8a)

Build on these in future weeks as we move into loving and serving others building on Mark 12:31…loving others as self…in particular marriage and family

6) Ephesians 5:21-33…Godly Love expressed in relationships and in particular in the Marriage Covenant and what it represents – Christ and His Bride, The Church.

7) Mark 1:40-42; 10:17-22…the full-orbed Love of God.

We’ve laid out the evidence of God’s Covenant Order and His Love for us and how we are to live that out with Him and others. First and foremost, we can only love because He first loved us (1 John 4:19; John 3:16; 1 John 3:16) and then there is an order in which we are to love…Worship and Love God, love the self we are recreated to be in Christ so we can love others (Mark 12:29-31).

This leads us to the third great text on Love in Scripture…

3) John 13:1-17…Love is lived out in humility, service, authority and discipleship…

The night Jesus was betrayed He instituted what has come to be known as The Last Supper. Here is a powerful synopsis of his interaction with His disciples that we should apply in our lives, relationships and discipleship, just as He shared and modeled them…

1) LOVE – He “loved them to the end” (v. 1).  According to one translation, “He showed them the full extent of His Love”…God is Love manifested in Christ so we really need to pay attention to what comes next

2) HUMILITY – He knew who He was…the essence of true humility and very important to understand as He expresses His love (v. 3)

3) SERVANT’S HEART – He bowed down, literally placing the disciples above Himself, and washed their feet…He served them (vv. 4-5). This didn’t change for one single moment who He was (v. 3)!

4) AUTHORITY – After interacting with Peter and teaching Him (and us) a valuable lesson), He stands up and asks if they realize what He’s done for them and clearly states that their belief in Him as the Authority is right (vv. 12-13)

5) DISCIPLESHIP – He tells them to follow His example as His disciples and in doing so they will be blessed (vv. 14-17).

There it is…the love of Jesus fully expressed in all He taught and lived for them and for us. The very next night He would be hung on the Cross to give the final ultimate example of True Love in Humility, Serving all of mankind with His sacrificial death and it did not change for one single moment Who He Was and Is – The Ultimate Authority, The King of kings and Lord of lords! That’s an example that we should follow as His disciples.

Unfortunately we separate these elements of His complete Love but in His Kingdom they never are separated. May we love as He has loved us!

God so loved us that He first loved us in willingly and sacrificially giving His own life through His Son; He has given us clear commands and priorities in how we are to grow in His love in loving Him and others; He has modeled it for us in Christ’s humble service in washing feet and laying down His life knowing that He was the Author of all things and had all power…How can we ever doubt that He would not love us always?

So what does that look like as we love others?  It brings us to the 4th great text on Love found in the New Testament…

4) Romans 8:37-39…God’s unfailing and inseparable love for us

Remember that there is nothing that can separate us from God’s love for us. While He gives us the freedom of choice to reject and walk away from His Love, He continues to love us, fully and perfectly, no matter what may come…not “death, nor life, nor angels, nor principalities, nor things present, nor things to come, nor powers, nor height, nor depth, nor any other created thing” can keep Him from loving us. We can reject it but it’s always there.  Because of His Love, by grace through faith, we are all-conquering victors as Christ lives in us (Romans 8:28, 37) no matter what we face!

The question is, can you truly say that you have that victory because you are walking with Him? How will you respond to His Love? You can choose to walk away if you desire…but why would you ever do that?

As we’ve focused on God’s Love as the Source, guidance and strength for how we are to love Him and others…because He first loved us…we’ve looked at How Jesus modeled it for us.  Now let’s see how it is to be manifested in our lives…in every relationship and in particular in our marriages, families and churches. Here’s the 5th great text on Love…

5) 1 Corinthians 13…Known as the Love Chapter describes what Godly love looks like to us and through us (emphasis vv. 4-8a)

Test yourself daily and see how you’re doing when it come to real Love…Love is: patient at all times; kind at all times; never jealous; never boastful or proud; always gracious; never self-seeking; not easily angered; never keeps score; always seeks out and rejoices with and in the Truth; always reliable; always believes, always hopes for the best and endures no matter what; LOVE NEVER FAILS!

None of us can know this kind of Love apart from Christ.  As stated last week, because of sin, no matter how much we may show compassion for our fellow man, we fall short when it comes to real Love…God’s Love…but it doesn’t change His standard. He gives us the strength to Love as He loves us.

Love and Lordship…Food for Thought – What kind of “love” is the world seeing in those of us who call Christ our Lord? How are these traits evident in your life, in your relationships, especially your marriage and with your spouse, family and children, and in The Body of Christ?  How are these qualities showing up in trying times and even with enemies or those who come against us? 

That’s the Love of God and it will always be available and see us through if we choose to know and walk in His Love in Christ!  

Love and Lordship…Action Item(s)

  1. Read the Scriptures in this article and ask The Holy Spirit to teach you how to love according to His commands and priorities.
  2. How can you practice Love in humble service and in Godly Authority as Christ’s disciple?
  3. Ask The Lord to show you what His unfailing Love for you is like right here and right now…It is always available as the only way you cannot know and experience it is to reject it. 
  4. What characteristics of Love from 1 Corinthians 13:4-8a do you need to work on and mature in?
  5. Start with your spouse and family (if applicable) or others closest to you, if not married and with a family, to practice this kind of Love.

Love and Lordship Prayer Focus…Heavenly Father, help me to love like You do.  Let me love in humility with a servant’s heart, practicing Your kind of authority in love as Christ’s disciple. In His Name. Amen.

The Discipline of Love

“If you love Me, you will keep (obey) My commandments.” (John 14:15)

Love and Lordship in Focus…Love includes feelings and emotions, both good and bad, but it is not defined or motivated by them. Love, according to God’s Word, is a commitment, a choice, an act of the will that requires me to walk in obedience to His Truth…and that requires discipline…not something our culture wants or likes to hear but absolutely true!

1 John 4:19; Mark 12:29-31; Matthew 22:37-39

(Refer to last week’s post for the seven texts on Love – https://loveandlordship.com/blog/discipleship-loving-response-required-to-his-lordship-2/

Foundation: I can only love because God first loved and still/always loves me (1 John 4:19)

From the moment that Adam and Eve ate the fruit of the Tree of Knowledge of Good and Evil sin entered the world and mankind has since been completely marred by it. This means that in and of ourselves, while there are remnants of our being created in God’s image that exist in us, we are incapable of real love, even loving our self. I know the world and all its messages through media, songs, social media, movies, etc., claims to know love and how to love but the reality is that in our flesh we don’t!  Sin has ruined our capacity to truly love.  But Love Himself (Christ) has restored it!

This is why it is so important to understand that with regard to love three things absolutely must happen…

1) I can only love because God, even in my sin, first loved us (1 John 4:19; John 3:16; 1 John 3:16);

2) Because of His great love for us, Christ has saved us by grace through faith (Ephesians 2:8-9) and we’re recreated as a new person in Christ and now, in Him, we can learn to love as we’ve been loved, and;

3) As new creations in Christ (2 Corinthians 5:17), we can now be taught what love is and by faith through grace grow and mature in His Love.

This is the essence of discipleship…that I have been given love (John 15:13) and the capacity to love (John 13:34) so as a new creation in Christ I can grow by discipline in love! I know, I know…not romantic but the only way!

Jesus spent two of His three years of public ministry (and likely a few years prior to that) in building the relationships with those He would call as His disciples, teaching them the discipline of Love in Truth before He sent them out to teach and disciple others. And they still often missed it…still had much growth and maturity to learn.  We should take heed to how we are being discipled and how we are discipling others in His Truth, Love and Grace so we can better know Jesus and make Him known in this way!

Based on the foundation (1 John 4:19; John 3:16; 1 John 3:16), our first and utmost priority response according to the first and greatest command is what?  What do we do with His Love for us, in us and through us?

1) Learn and mature in worship of God alone (Mark 12:29)

“Hear, O Israel: The Lord our God, the Lord is one.” Early manuscripts of this would read, “Hear, O Israel: The Lord our God in one Lord.” This priority, first and greatest command (which we so often ignore or dismiss in our discipleship of ourselves and others) is Jesus simply repeating the great truth given to the Israelites as the most important commands before entering in to claim The Promised Land of Canaan (Deuteronomy 6:4-9).

God told Moses to tell the Israelites that the following were of utmost importance…to worship Him alone and love Him with their whole being. He told them to teach and continually impress these truths more than anything else upon their children, grandchildren (and future generations) in every part of their lives! 

Every Jew would have known upon hearing this from Moses and Jesus that God is Lord, the Only Lord, and the Only One worthy of our worship and praise. Every Jew that took this to heart and every other Jew they would disciple…and every Gentile that was discipled and then discipled others would have been taught and known that they must start right here with the first and greatest of commands…or all others were unattainable.

How are we doing in discipling others to worship God and Him alone?  Only as we do so can we build on the second part of this first and greatest command out of our absolute and undivided worship of Him!

2) Learn and mature to love God with our whole being (Mark 12:30; Matthew 22:37-38)

First and foremost this part of the command must be seen from the perspective of Who God Is…being the Only One worthy of all our praise and worship, we are to strive, learn and grow in our love for Him with all our heart, mind, soul and strength.

There is no part of us that should neglect or be held back from committing our all to Him (loving Him)! Remember from previous posts, love is not an emotion or feeling (it has good & bad emotions attached to it but they do not define love)…Love is a sacrificial, selfless, submissive giving of our self in commitment to another. Jesus is our perfect Example in His commitment to (love for) The Father, and then for us, in His obedient death on the Cross…to save us.

We need to take the time in being discipled and in discipling others to make sure we are obedient to God’s first and greatest command…worship Him alone and Love Him with all that we are. Then and only then can we begin to move into, and be obedient to, the second greatest command!

These commands were given so that we could grow in the capacity to Love as we followed them in line with His priorities.  I cannot love myself or others until my heart is set on, and I am learning to, worship God alone and love him with all my being.  Until I do so, any “love” for others will flow from my flesh and cause trouble for many as I’ve missed the grace given (Hebrews 12:15) to love as He commanded.  As we take seriously God’s Word, in our worship of, and love for Him, we begin to see that He is not only pleased with our love for Him but in the process (discipleship) He is showing us who we are re-created to be in Christ, and in so doing, how to love who we are in Christ. Remember, discipleship is maturation in loving relationships, not paralysis in our lack of perfection. Now I can…

3) Learn and mature in Godly love for myself so I can love sacrificially as Christ did and does (Mark 12:31b; Matthew 22:39)

This is not the self-centered false love of the world and pop psychology. It is rooted completely in the self-giving, sacrificial Love of God for us and subsequently in our love for Him (Foundation and First/Greatest Command). NOW we can begin to do in love what Christ did for us…give our self away for the sake of others so they can know Him and His Love as well.

In line with God’s Word, I can only love others to the extent that I love God and myself (again the self re-created in Christ). This is not loving the false self of the old person before Christ but knowing and loving the new person and true identity found in receiving Him as Savior and walking with Him as Lord…discipleship in loving relationship(s). Be obedient to love who God has made you to be in Christ (Psalm 139:14; Ephesians 2:10).

Lack of self-love in God’s design and commands is one of the greatest detriments to loving relationships, especially in marriages and families, extending into our churches. I understand why the world doesn’t get it but we must be different!  We need to disciple others in His kind of Love for us and for our selves if we are going to show the world His Love.

In so many cases in our churches today we assume that receiving Christ as Savior immediately and automatically makes us mature believers in Him as Lord. So much of the New Testament gives evidence that this is not the case in teachings to help us mature as His disciples in His Truth, Love and Grace so we can point others to Him.

As we take God seriously in His Word and commands we can…

4) Learn and mature in loving others as we love ourselves and as Christ loves us (Mark 12:31a; John 13:34)

Far too often in today’s world and churches so many try to love and serve others without having spent much or any time growing and knowing the first and greatest command…what it means to love God and then to love who they are in Christ. This is not in line with God’s Word.

These commands were not haphazardly written and God just placed worship and love for Himself first. He never does anything haphazardly so we must recognize and honor this Truth…until I’ve given my heart to fulfilling His first and greatest command, I can’t fulfill the Second.

We need to disciple new and young believers in what it looks like to spend time in God’s Word, in prayer, quiet listening and meditation so we can know Him, worship Him and love Him. As we do so He is faithful to prune, shape, purge, cleanse, mold, bless and favor us for His purposes as He can trust us because we know who we are in Christ!

Love and Lordship…Food for Thought – Discipleship in loving relationships is not about perfection but about obedience (love) and maturation in faith. In so doing, we begin to show others the Love that He has shown us and we become confident and content in who we are because of Christ in us. Now we can love others as He has commanded and they will see a love that they desire…His Love in and through us!

Love in Action

  1. Read the Scriptures in this article and ask The Holy Spirit to teach you how to love according to His commands and priorities.
  2. Ask Him to show you how He first loved you and how He loves you right now.
  3. Ask Him what you need to do to worship Him alone and Love Him with all you are. This is about setting your heart on Him and then growing in His Love and in your Love for Him.
  4. Ask Him to show you who you are in Christ and how to love this new person/identity found only in Christ.
  5. Ask Him how you have been trying to love others as a priority over loving Him and how He can show you how to truly love them.

Love and Lordship Prayer Focus Heavenly Father, forgive me when I run ahead of You and Your clear teaching and commands that my discipleship begins with my relationship with You and growing to Love you with all I am. As I do so, then I ask that You would show me how to love who I am in Christ so I can love and make disciples of others by teaching them to follow through on Your greatest commands in the way You gave them to us, knowing this is the only way that we can fulfill them and point others to Your Love in Christ! In His Name. Amen.